27 February 2011

About Me.

I'm 24 (yesterday a women was very shocked when I said I was 24, she thought I was 19). I love with my dad and two little sisters. Mum is still around. She moved out in November last year, because she decided that she didn't want to be married to my father anymore. This resulted in the house I've lived in all my life to be put on the market (with both my mother and father stating "it will take at least 6 months to sell") 17 days after going on the market it sold. Lucky for us, the new owners aren't moving in until April, so we have some time to find a new place. Which we have, kinda... We are waiting on the bank to see if dad earns enough to give him a loan. An optimist would be positive that everything will be okay... I'm a "realist" I know dad is on the low end of the earning scale, but I also think it will work out okay... sometimes, I have my emo moments. But I had emo moments before all this happened.

I work 2 paid jobs (Blockbuster as a "film guru" and Target as a "door bitch" and "checkout chick") and 1 volunteer job (Albany and Regional Volunteer Service as "the Agency Bitch"), but still don't seem to earn enough money to do anything. I've never been good at saving, never done a budget, and for someone that considers herself organised.... I'm not really.

I'm overweight... the technical term is "morbidly obese" which scares the bejebus out of me. My "goal weight" is half my weight. It's hard. Somedays are better than others, but my life is in limbo at the moment, between houses, emotional breakdowns, too much work... I just don't know. It will come. I'm young, there are people who are overweight all there lives and never even consider trying to do anything about it.

I've never been in a relationship... EVER! I blame my weight, but there are heaps of people, who are bigger than me that are in stable relationships. It's all about self confidence... which to me... equals ZERO. Online me, and Offline me are 2 completly different people.

All my good friends live in my computer :)

And this is me. As so NOW. looking a little red (I always have red cheeks... I blame my mother) and my room is looking a little messy. (that's because I'm half packed. My aunt came into my room this afternoon and said "you haven't started packing yet?" but I have... I've packed heaps.... it just seems to be NEVER ENDING!



  1. I'm 24 too! Interesting age, I don't feel my age. I find it so strange that i'll be turning 25. I still feel around 19.

    I don't work. I want to, but no one wants to hire me. With my mental problems, I'm not too good at public transport so there are only so many places I can apply too.

    I used to feel the same about my weight, that I didn't have a boyfriend because of it. Wasn't that. Was just that I was super shy. I've lost weight, but I'm still currently 108kg. My goal is 100. Relationships aren't all they are cracked up to be though :P

    I happen to think your beautiful and you seem like a lovely person!

  2. thanks heaps. I know I can live a happy life as I am right now, but I just can't bring myself to live like this. All my "problems" are because of my weight. I know I shouldn't think that, it's just the way I am. But I know that one day I will be happy with myself. Not that I'm not happy now :D